In the article by Christie Church, "Feminism Keeps My Marriage Together," Church uses her own story of unexpected encounters with sexism and the patriarchy and the limitations or expectations they impose to illustrate the point that "no matter how many gains feminism makes, it should never cease to be taught, because younger generations will be stunned powerless in the face of unexpected sexism without having any feminist education to help put that sexism into context." My question is of where feminism is being taught - does she mean informally, shared or passed down by feminists through values and ideologies, or is she referring to a formal education setting, such as a college or university? Either way, I agree with her point that it is important to include feminism as a part of education.
I also liked her (and her husband's) approach to marriage: the fact that their decision to get married was a conversation rather than a proposal, and that they got each other high-tops instead of the traditional engagement ring. I'll admit that I had never really considered before that there isn't an equivalent of an engagement ring for men. This article provided a lot of interesting fodder for thought about the institution of marriage as a sexist and misogynistic. Church's observes that "we are all socialized to see marriage as a woman's prize for being appropriately attractive and wily, and how men are offered no part in it except as reluctant, defeated lumps following behind."
Hearing about people's narrow-minded reactions to their nontraditional approach was disappointing, but not altogether unexpected. A similar story is that of Jessica Valenti, founder of feministing.com, who also encountered unfavorable responses, even from "fellow feminists who felt that getting married was a sop to the patriarchy." Valenti wrote about it for the Guardian, where she details her experiences planning the feminist wedding. It's an interesting read, and gives other examples of how she and her husband incorporated feminism into the wedding.
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